Recently, someone asked me what body acceptance coaching is all about and why I feel so passionate about it. I think a couple You Tube videos help me explain my passion. One is the sketching of adult women by a forensic scientist and another the interviewing of young girls between the ages of six and eighteen .
I’d like to introduce you to those videos. This first one is very moving. The forensic artist asks women to describe themselves to him as he sketches them behind a curtain. Then, he asks strangers to describe those same women as he sketches that version of her. The results are amazing. When I first saw this video eight years ago, I was moved to tears. I still am today.
How many times do you tell someone all the things “wrong” with your face, chin, eyes, hair or other body part and yet someone else compliments you on those very same features?
This is one of the reasons I do what I do. I used to be one of these women. I would point out my double chin, full cheeks and the bags under my eyes in any picture I had taken of me. If it was a picture with a full body view, I would point out how “fat” I was and vow to go on another diet. The cycle was vicious. I could never seem to find anything right with my body. If someone complimented me, I found fault in that compliment.
Another reason I do what I do is because I want the women I coach to show up compassionately for themselves and the daughters they are raising. These young daughters are so impressionable. They watch your every move and are keen on your own battle with your body. They pick up on your queues – mom is dieting. She must have something wrong with her. Mom fights back the compliments people give her so I too must find fault in any that are given to me.
I only wish I would have worked with a coach in my early twenties to fully accept my changing young adult body so as to offer it acceptance and compassion. My now 22 year old daughter witnessed me try diet after diet, never accepting the body God has graced me with. She also heard me turn down compliment after compliment, only pointing out what was wrong with my body.
As I watch the video below of the young girls talking about how they wear black leggings to look small or how they feel larger in comparison to their circle of friends, my heart aches. I do what I do to help change that, one woman at a time. Unfortunately, much of what these girls are saying in this video are common thoughts of adult women – there is something inherently “wrong” with me. It saddens me. I was one of these girls and it bled into most of my adulthood until a few years ago.
If you can relate to any of the women or young girls in these two You Tube videos, you are not alone, yet you can change your belief system. You can learn to accept the body you are in and show up authentically. You will feel freer, like a big weight has been lifted from you. You will be happier because you are no longer spending a bulk of your energy on figuring out how to change your body. You will have a better relationship with those closest to you because you are now offering yourself the love and compassion you were searching for them to give you.
I am here to help you. Let’s talk about where you are today and where you want to be tomorrow. There is a better way and you are so worthy of it!